Began with a nice easy yoga pose, circle&bloom meditation and then made myself a nice fresh beetroot and celery juice. Took myself the bathroom feeling very happy and excited (calm would be impossible!).
I was all ready for my soapless, shampooless shower. Opened the door to find Rufus in a cloud of lavendar-scented steam.
Inner peace goes out the window in an instant.
“Did you use soap?” I manage to squeak out. I could. Not. Believe. It.
“Just that organic lavendar shampoo,” he said.
“But they said noooooooo perfumes!”
“But you said I could use this?”
“LAST NIGHT I said you could use that. I told you a thousand times we couldn’t use anything this morning.” I know I sounded like a complete harpy by this stage. I felt like a harpy. I was incredulous.
I was thinking that maybe he couldn’t come in with me for the transfer and I sooooo wanted him there this time to hold my hand. (Last time I went in with my mum as Rufus was thousands of miles away)
We transferred bathrooms for a nice hot soapless shower and he emerged smelling au naturel. I think. I kept sniffing him in the car on the way over.
At the clinic everything went so smoothly. We suited up and went in. The same lovely nurse who helped me during retrieval was there. Dr E came in and told us we had one perfect blasto and one early blasto – I couldn’t believe it! And the other two are still hanging on in there! They will look at them tomorrow to see if they make blasto, and can be frozen. I got all teary when he told me – I never imagined that all four would still be there by today.
We went into the theatre and he did the speculum and a mock transfer first. And then a lab technician appeared with our blastos, checked our names, and handed them over to Dr E. “You have beautiful embryos,” she said. I got all teary again.
And Rufus was there holding my hand. Dr E transferred them, while I lay there imagining my welcoming uterus accepting them and giving them a good place to grow. Dr E told me there was no chance they would “fall out” which is all you can really think about at that moment. We took an extra progesterone suppository, and then I also had a progesterone shot in my butt. I stayed lying down for about 40 minutes afterwards, made Rufus sing me a little song he sometimes sings me, to keep that positive vibe flowing through my body. And am now back on my sofa with a pot of caffeine-free rooibus tea feeling full of hope.
They gave us a picture of our blastos which I keep looking at. Dr E says implantation will happen in the next few days, and Beta is November 24. He said it was now 50-50 chance of being preggers – our best odds yet.